She and a friend thought some body art might be the right remedy. So, von Hagen had some Japanese characters drawn on her lower back, where they remain to this day. Roughly translated, the characters mean "less anger, more smile."

Those in the touchy-feely set would say that von Hagen's inscription made a cosmic impact. A year later, the 25-year-old is one of the hottest comedians working in Canada. Starting Wednesday (June 6), she graduates to headliner status -- featuring at the Yuk Yuk's Superclub until June 10. A little over a month later, she will perform at a gala show at the Just for Laughs Festival in Montreal. Von Hagen will be playing the St. Denis Theatre with the likes of The Daily Show's Jon Stewart. (In the interest of full disclosure, I should also mention that von Hagen is one of six comedians participating in a documentary I'm working on for the National Film Board.)

In all, it's a lot of attention for a woman who did her first amateur night in 1996 at a dingy club in Victoria, B.C.

"People keep telling me that I'm more confident, that I've changed," von Hagen says, as she relaxes at a restaurant on the Danforth. "But I tell them, 'Isn't that how it's supposed to be? If I was getting worse, that would be bad.' That is the way comedy is -- slowly you begin to figure things out."

Von Hagen's apprenticeship began on the West Coast. The child of a Scottish mother and German father, she had a bucolic upbringing in Victoria. High school nicknames included "Von Halen" and "Von Haagen-Dazs." Teenaged Kristeen grew up idolizing the likes of Dave Letterman and the Saturday Night Live crew. She went to Ellen DeGeneres' and Dennis Miller's stand-up shows. Once, von Hagen saw Vancouver comedian Craig Campbell open for the American heavy hitter.

"I thought Craig was great, and I knew he was Canadian," she recalls, "and I thought I'd like to try that."

A few weeks later, she performed at her first open mic and was hooked. Von Hagen soon moved to Vancouver, dreaming of becoming a comedian. She did Theatresports and "the improv garbage," then made her way to Punchlines stand-up club. She caught on as an amateur, playing the intimate stand-up circuit in Vancouver. After a year, she pulled up stakes and flew to Toronto, "just to see what was going on for a few months." She quickly nestled into the local scene, becoming a fixture at such alternative gigs as Spirits and the Rivoli's Alt.Comedy Lounge.

Von Hagen has been in Hogtown ever since, and like a horse breaking into the lead during the final turn of the track, has come into her own in the last six months. When she first hit the scene, she did a lot of standard, self-deprecating humour. A typical bit was her line on Overeaters Anonymous. "What's that supposed to be? Lots of 'I'm fat. Shh. Don't tell anybody.'" Trouble was, there was nothing unique about her material. It could have been done by any of a dozen dowdy stand-ups.

As von Hagen grew experienced, she branched out. Today, rather than being self-flagellating, von Hagen is modest, a far more endearing attribute. She applies her curious sense of humour to the external realm. Onstage, she exudes an easygoing yet insightful personality. She likes to wrangle with pop culture, relationships and general stupidities.

Here's a bit of vintage von Hagen: "I've been watching a lot of Magnum P.I. and Miami Vice -- it's awesome, but it's beginning to affect me personally. Like, I find myself really attracted to men who look like they are from the '80s. It's weird. I'll see some guy in acid wash jeans and a bushy Tom Selleck moustache and I'm with a friend and I'm like, 'Oh my God, check him out....' My friend is like, 'Who? The homeless guy?' And I'm like, 'Yes, the homeless guy. He's very sensual.'"

This evolution stems from von Hagen's own metamorphosis. We're talking the kind of personal growth normally reserved for testimonials on Oprah. Over the last 18 months, she has dedicated herself to an exercise regime and has reshaped her figure to suit her own liking. She let her hair grow out and bought a new wardrobe. This external groove worked like a tonic for her work onstage.

"You know, in this business it does matter how you look," she admits. "I don't know why it took so long to occur to me."

Jeez, and we all thought comedy was supposed to destroy people.

Von Hagen's Superclub week marks a personal watershed. "It's a big step. It establishes you. It says, 'You have the time, you can pull it off, you're a real comic,'" she says, pausing to let the reality settle in. "And that in itself is kind of frightening."

Like most Canadian comedians, von Hagen is looking south. When the time is right, she'll shimmy down to Los Angeles and take her shot. One thing is certain -- there are not many comedians out there who can deliver what von Hagen has to offer. She's spent the last four years building herself into a unique comic equation. As the late Henny Youngman once told me, "I decided I would get a delivery nobody else could imitate. That way, if a club wanted me, they had to hire me."

"You always wonder what the next step is," says von Hagen. "I think I'd make a good best friend on a sitcom. You know, the star is doing something important and I walk in and say, 'Hi!' and then the audience cheers. That would be cool."

THE HARD FACTS ON KRISTEEN VON HAGEN

Have you ever been in a fight with
anyone over the age of 16?

"I've shoved a few people."

Dream gig:

"Appearing on Letterman."

If you were a food, what food would you be?

"Cheese, 'cause it's delicious."

Dog or cat?

"Cat."

Brush with celebrity:

"I won a contest and got to meet the Rolling Stones. Before I met Mick Jagger, a woman came up to me and warned me not to be surprised, but that I would find he had the softest hands of anyone I'd ever met. And they were, kind of satin, almost hypnotic. I found myself thinking, 'Let go of Mick Jagger's hand.' Then Keith Richards called me darling."

Drinks?

"Vodka-soda or water. I only drink clear liquids."

Have you ever performed drunk or high?

"Yes."

Most embarrassing moment?

"That's tough, there are so many."

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